Where have I been?

WOW!  It's been a while since I've blogged.  Let's try to catch up a bit...

School is out and the hot summer weather is here!  It's been 105 degrees the past few days.  Anything over 90 is too hot for me! 

But before summer we had some fun things happen at school...PROM! 

Of course, we had to start with a haircut...

 



Al and I went out to Olive Garden (thanks to a gift certificate from Ken).  Al ordered Sausage Penne and LOVED it!  The night got off to a great start!

 

 Then we met everyone at school....notice the "yellow limo" in the background?  Yup.  We went on a bus!  This group cleans up nice!

 

 Here's a picture of their group picture.  Only 11 of the kids pictured are in Al's class and the others are peer tutors.  They had a great time and I was very impressed with how the rest of the school treats his class.  A lot of people were coming up to Alex to say HI and then when he asked them to dance, they all danced.  The person saying HI, their date, and Al!  I have loved having Alex in high school.  Between him growing up and trying so hard to be a big kid and the teachers and peer tutors, I have to say that high school has been a great experience for Alex.  Next year he will be an "almost senior" (Junior - but he's stuck on the senior part), he will be on the wrestling team again (and now that we've been through a year I will feel more comfortable letting him be more involved (meaning go to some away matches), and thank goodness he will have the same teachers.  I'm so proud of him and all he's accomplished!

 

 

As you can see from the big picture at the top of our blog, we got our family pictures taken!  I am so excited to show these off!!  We had them taken by Melanie Isaac and I would suggest her to anyone that is looking for a photographer.  She did a great job capturing everyone's personality and has great pricing.

 

 

 A, Kierra, M, Colby

  O, Josh, Cali, and the balloons represent McKallister and Quincy

 

Taylor holding C, Brandon

 My baby!  He's becoming a man; he's shaving and everything!  He has to or else he has this really sparse, icky hair patch growing off his chin.  But, man, is he handsome!!!  And I have to tell you my secret about him driving.  NO!  He's not driving!!  I have told him when he's as tall as his brothers he can get his license.  When he gets his license he can get a phone.  I have it all figured out.  And I'm pretty sure I'm safe.  Thank goodness he hasn't figured out that I'm no where near as tall as his brothers!  If he ever does....well, I'm a girl.  The rules are different for girls!  BUT he mows our lawn with grandpa's riding mower!  I walk in front of him (yes, I'm dumb brave!) and he follows behind driving the mower.  He does pretty good, too!  He's only taken our 1 of our sprinklers and demolished one bird house.  Not bad!

 

We are so proud of our little gaggle of girls!

 

 

 

Oh.  My.  Beautiful!  Thank you Melanie!!!

 

And, of course once we got our pics taken, we had an addition to our family. ...

Meet CR.  He was born a few weeks before we had pictures taken, and we had met him, but birth mom had not signed adoption papers, yet.  Let me fill you in....

 

Our neighbor's daughter's friend's dad's fiancé (whew!!) was pregnant.  It wasn't a planned pregnancy and they were having troubles financially to raise the kids they already had.  They were considering adoption so they were told about Josh and Cali.  (That's really the only way to adopt anymore - word of mouth.  Even going through an agency there are just so many couples waiting and not enough babies available.)  So Cali and birth mom met one Friday evening and got along great.  When they were saying their good-byes birth mom made a comment that made Cali uncomfortable so she pushed that baby to the side.  The next day, Saturday, Cali got a text; "I am 15 and have a 5 week old baby.  Are you still looking at adopting?"  After texts and phone calls, they met Sunday evening with birth mom, her parents and birth dad.  They had been looking at their blog for the past 6 months and birth parents were just realizing they couldn't raise this baby.  They were so convinced that they wanted Cali and Josh to adopt this little girl that they brought ALL of her belongings and left her with them that night!  The plan was to meet them at the adoption agency on Monday evening for parents to sign papers.  So, they have this sweet, little girl in their home for 24 hours, they bond, they fall in love and they even had spiritual confirmation that she belonged in their family. 

 

Monday around noon, birth mom's dad called Cali and said that things were changing.  Birth dad's mom and her partner both had to give children up for different reasons, and had convinced this young couple that they could do it with their help!  It was more than heart breaking for Josh and Cali to put this baby in a car that smelled of drugs with this young couple and his mom's partner.  They got a few texts from birth mom over the next few days, but that was the end of that story.  A big affirmation of how we all have our agency, even if it's not what God planned.

 

While Cali and Josh were working through this fiasco, they got a bunch of calls from the first mom (that she met with on Friday) saying that she had given birth to a baby boy and she wanted them to have him!  Of course with the comment this birth mom had made that had made Cali uncomfortable, and then with getting and losing this little girl, their emotions and nerves were raw.  Cali texted her and told her they were sick and they would call her in a few days.  When Cali did call her she made it very clear that if birth mom wouldn't go through an agency, that they weren't able to continue.  Birth mom said that was great!  Come see him! 

 

He was premature  not sure how premature but guessing a 34 weeker) and in the NICU but they had saved a wrist band for Cali.  Cali visited him almost everyday after that, with Josh going as often as he could.  All of us grandparents even got to go see him a couple of times!

 

 Whenever Cali walked in the room and said his name, CR would turn his head towards her!  They fed him, changed him, loved him, all while he was in the NICU.  Birth mom didn't sign her rights away until the day he was released (3 weeks later) so there was still some concern that he would be theirs, but he is home with them and growing like the great man he will become!  So even though we knew about him when we got our family pictures taken, since papers hadn't been signed and Cali and Josh had already had a baby slip through their fingers, we didn't dare wait to have our pictures taken.  It just means we have to do it again real soon!!!

 Papa and I LOVE holding our little man!

 

Alex and I went on a hike recently with the Maughan family up Bell Canyon.  It was really hard for Alex but he pushed through it!  Every once in a while he would rub his hips and say, "Yup.  They're still there."  He was real hesitant.  I don't know if he was scared of getting hurt or what, but like I said, he persevered!!

 

A is a climber and is walking all over the place now!... I think she's crazy!!  And I have NO idea where that would have come from??

 

 

 OK, OK, OK.... she may be a bit like me.

 

Remember N's hairdo?....

 

...she got a big girl's haircut and looks soooo good!  We loved the wild look, but she looks like a 2 year old now!  AND...

 

 ...she's crawling!!  It's a little unorthodox, and this video was actually taken when she first started crawling but it's so cute I couldn't resist sharing.  I will put a more recent video of her crawling soon.  She's really improved!  But this is so cute!!!

 

So.  Life is good.  Life is busy.  Life is grand!  And I'm the luckiest lady in the world!!!

 

It's been a while

I haven't written in a while.  There has been some crap that hit the fan and I didn't want to sound negative or down so I thought I would wait.  See if I could write about it without a tone of anger.

Hmmmm.  I don't think that's gonna happen.

First of all, after all the love that was spread because of and for the wrestling team, my heart was broken to hear there had been some hazing among some of the players.  So DUMB!  There's a point where "boys being boys" goes too far, and if what I heard is true, it definitely went too far.  But that's not the only low point of this story.  Again, if what I hear is true, then the school district bullied these kids.  They were interviewed without the knowledge or consent of their parents, and they didn't have another adult in the room with them other than those representing the district.  We are supposed to be teaching our children that bullying (hazing, fighting, intimidating) is wrong, but then as they are being investigated they are being bullied themselves.  So unfair. 

I know that above paragraph sounds confusing - "if what I hear is true" - but I really don't have any first hand knowledge of what occurred during the supposed hazing incident, or during the supposed interrogations.  I do know that 11 boys weren't able to wrestle during the regional and state competitions.  After all the work they put into their practices and getting in shape, and they don't get the chance to compete because of stupidity.   If this becomes a criminal matter then they have ruined their lives, not just the end of their year.

I feel very confident that Alex was NEVER around during the hazing or saw any of it happen.  He was always with coaches or me.  I'm not concerned at all about that.  Thank goodness!  I guess it does  pay to be a pushy mother.  It took a lot of my time, but at least I know Alex was safe.

At the same time this was coming to light, Cali got an email from a birth mother saying she had been looking at their blog, and wanted to talk about them adopting her babies.  Yes!  Babies...she was pregnant with twin girls.  She had divorced her husband and was getting remarried when she had a fling with her ex, and got pregnant.  Both the ex-husband and new husband were OK with adopting the babies out and they liked Josh and Cali as adoptive parents, too.  The girls were due the first part of March, so this was happening fast!

In the course of a week they exchanged emails;  birth mom's name was Kali (wow!), they had called one of the girls Harley (one of Mac's neighbors name is Harley and we've always commented on what a cute name that is).  Kali had mentioned she found Cali through Josh's sisters blog, and they emailed back and forth about Josh's sisters kids as well as Mac and Quincy.... and then BAM!!! 

3 am - a phone call from a blocked number.  Cali didn't answer it.

A message was left.  "This is Kali.  My water just broke.  Your babies are coming."

Right after Josh and Cali listened to this message, Kali called back.  "I didn't just want to tell you this through a message.  I'm so excited for you right now!  We will be at ___________  hospital.  I will keep  in touch as things progress!  You will have your babies sooner than we thought!"

At 6 am, Cali received an email with pictures of 2 very cute, tiny, precious baby girls.  A message attached said, "Kali asked me to send these to you.  She is talking to a case worker right now.  She will call in a while."

Cali was so excited.  Josh wasn't convinced it was real (their caseworker had warned them that moms with twins could very easily be a scam) and yet they couldn't even get a hold of their caseworker for at least 3 more hours!  Talk about tension!!  Kali and Cali talked on the phone and cried with each other about these babies; how hard it was for Kali to give them up but how she knew Cali was the right person to have them.  Cali telling Kali that she already loved the girls and would take great care of them.

9 am.  Their caseworker gave her a list of information they would need to continue with this.  A response from Kali, but no information.  Caseworker is getting really nervous.  Cali still sure this is the real thing.  Josh won't even talk about it until there is no question if this is real or not.

10 am.   Cali asks one more time to get Kali's caseworker's info so that the 2 caseworkers can start working things out.

NOTHING.

More nothing.........

Then came an email from Kali;  "I just found out you are a fraud.  How could you hurt a mom when you are a mom yourself?  I will just find someone here to take the babies."

Hurt. 
  
       Betrayal.
          
              Anger.
                
                   Confusion.

There are no words to describe how we felt.  This is the second time our family has been part of a fraud scam involving adopting kids (first time was with Mike's brother and his wife) so you would think we would know these things happen.  I guess we just never thought it would happen to Cali and Josh.  Not after all they've been through. 

This Kali knew what she was doing.  All the warning signs that we raised she could answer simply.  Like the blocked phone number?  It was because her husband is in the armed forces and they lived on base so outgoing calls only show up as blocked.   OK. So now it sounds hokey.  But when you're in the middle of a tornado - well let's just say it was believable.

I hurt so bad watching Cali and Josh deal with another devastating blow.  And one that someone planned.  Concocted.  Acted out!  Who would do such a thing?  She read and re-read Cali's blog so she could give intimate details to snare Cali in the scheme.... 

They cried together on the phone....

She dared say that she was grateful her "little girls would have Mac and Quincy as big brothers."

That's the lowest.  Mentioning someone so treasured and loved by Cali and Josh and using their names as bait.  And then to blame Cali and call HER the fraud?!?



Cali and Josh are dealing with this well.  There is no recourse they can take to find this woman or stop her from doing it to anyone else.  They don't even know if her name is really Kali!  They have Oakland who they love to the moon and back and they have Mac and Quincy who are waiting in heaven with some REAL brothers or sisters until it is truly their time to come be with Josh and Cali in their family here on earth.

Even though this is a cruel world, we are children of a God who loves us immensely and knows the pain we feel.  No one - no matter how evil they are - can take that away from us.  They can kick us while we are down, but our Father in heaven will always be there to help us back up. 

So bring it on you stupid people!  I may not be tough, but the army on my side will whoop your butt!!